Deadbeat mom insults 16-year-old son for saying his 14-year-old sister is his only sibling, despite his 3 half-siblings: 'I told her my sister is the one who counts, not her other kids.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Nov 16, 2025 8:00 AM EST

She's the only sibling he has any relationship with, and that's what matters.

A sibling bond is like no other. My sister and I are the only people alive who know precisely what it was like to grow up with our parents as our parents. We've spent so much time together just because of the coincidence of our births, and there's nobody I'd rather have as my sibling. I've had friends with whom I've spent more time as an adult than I've with my sister, but that doesn't mean I'm closer with them than I am with her. Siblings you've known your whole life (or nearly your whole life) have a very different bond than half-siblings and step-siblings who were blended into a family when the kids were not babies. Of course, every family is different, but if The Fosters on ABC taught me anything, it's that Callie and Jude are more sister and brother than Callie and Brandon will literally ever be, and that's for more than one reason.

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  • Teenage boy and girl standing near people in public square
    via swore

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The siblings in this story have a special bond. Their mom left them when they were very young, and she has only seen them once a month for nearly their whole lives. Now she has three other children with a different dad, and she wants them to see those three children as their siblings, even though they barely see them and have virtually no relationship with them.

  • Am I the bad guy for saying my full sister is my only sibling when I technically have half siblings?

    Me (16) and my sister (14) live. with our dad. We see our mom once a month for her weekend of visitation. She left dad when my sister was like a month old. Her and dad divorced and once we
    via u/Ryekiys
  • got older (2 and 4) she started to see us again but it was always once a month. The only thing that changed was she started visitation coming to see us and then it was us going to her house.
    via u/Ryekiys
  • Brown and white brick house under blue sky during daytime
    via Dillon Kydd

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I never felt close to mom and never really wanted to go to her house. But even now that I'm 16 a judge has said I need to keep going until I'm 18 and he ruled the same way about my sister. He said it's already way less than kids should get with a biological parent but since it's always been this he wasn't going to change it once we were older.
    via u/Ryekiys
  • So I still see mom once a month. She remarried when I was 10 and she's popped out three more babies. I never saw those babies as my real family or siblings. We came from the same mother but I don't even consider her my family or my real parent. She's someone who chose to walk away and come back and see us hardly ever.
    via u/Ryekiys
  • A close up of a woman with red hair
    via Sandra Seitamaa (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • A few weeks ago my mom decided to visit for my sister's birthday and she wanted to meet our friends and stuff. She must have asked or someone must have said something because she asked us why we said we only had one sibling when clearly we both have four siblings. I told her my sister is the one who counts, not her other kids. My sister said she felt the same way.
    via u/Ryekiys
  • Mom got mad at dad for not insisting we acknowledge her other kids. She told us she wanted us to make more of an effort with them and start spending more time at her place. I told her I don't even wanna be there once a month and I'm not going to spend time with kids I don't want to see or spend time with. She told me they're my
    via u/Ryekiys
  • siblings and with the way I'm talking I need to spend time with them. She said if they heard me say only my sister counted they would be so hurt. I asked her why she thought I cared about that and I said if she wants to avoid that hurt to stop making me go to her house. Then her kids can forget about me.
    via u/Ryekiys
  • Dad had to make mom leave she was getting so mad and loud. And she kept being like "this is not okay, this is a disgusting mindset". My dad tried to keep it from us but mom has been giving him such a hard time since she visited. I heard her on the phone tell him that she never expected her son to talk to her like I did.
    via u/Ryekiys
  • I don't know why she expected any different. To me it makes sense because those kids are hardly a part of my life and when I'm 18 they won't be a part of it at all. But maybe that's something an asshole would say and do so why not ask online, right? AITAH?
    via u/Ryekiys
  • Vestiel NTA, she abandoned you, now she wants to play mommy and thinks all is good and dandy. Just tell her your 18th birthday is closer than she thinks and you will go NC once that happens.
    via u/Vestiel
  • Ryekiys OP But still only a once a month mom. She had so many years to fight for more time with us and she didn't. She wants us over there more to be siblings to her other kids. Like that was ever going to happen.
    via u/Ryekiys
  • semisociallyawkward Just a quick piece of advice for your own sanity - start a countdown. At most, you need to see her 24 more times, and your sister 48 more times. Hang a poster with those slots in your room at your dad's, and put stickers or checkmarks when you finish a visit.
    via u/semisociallyawkward
  • Miserable-Truth5035 Maybe also add a couple small gifts in it for sister if she feels the same. Every 5 milestone, this can also be free stuff like movie night at home. Just make sure you can still keep up with the gifts if you move out for studies before she is 18 (but it could be movie night at your new place).
    via u/Miserable-Truth5035
  • semisociallyawkward Yeah I was also thinking that seeing a huge number tick down slowly could be unbearable for the sister. Smaller things to look forward to (especially things like a weekend away) could help a lot.
    via u/semisociallyawkward
  • Lucky-Effective-1564 She wants you there to babysit.
    via u/Lucky-Effective-1564
  • Beta Testaburger She may have birthed you and your sister but she is not and never was your mother, so in what world can you consider her kids, your siblings? That being said, did she ever try to get more than a few hours a month or did she or your dad think that was enough?
    via u/BetaTestaburger
  • Ryekiys OP She never tried to get more time with us. She's saying we should be with her more now but she didn't try to be an equal mom when she came back.
    via u/Ryekiys
  • Astyryx She sees you 3% of every year. She's a 3% parent. Her children are half of that, 1.5%. If being your mom was a dollar, she is 3 cents.
    via u/Astyryx

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Tags

family drama deadbeat brother mother fatherhood siblings motherhood parenting dad family sibling sister mom Parenting Fail half siblings Father Parenting FAILS
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